9-5-2006 (8)

“I feel like the Snow Patrol album Eyes Open was written just for me. Proof of the universal human experience I am sure.”

—

“My birthday is coming up. If you’ll be in LA on the 17th, stay tuned for party location. There will be beer brewed just for the occasion!”

—

“Emerging Environmental Issues in Drilling and Completions.”

—

http://www.christianbooksbibles.com/noomadvdsbyrobbell1-20-1.aspx

nooma

&#8220;<p>buildings and bridges<br/> are made to bend in the wind<br/> to withstand the world<br/> that&#8217;s what it takes<br/> all that steel and stone<br/> is no match for the air, my friend<br/> what doesn&#8217;t bend breaks<br/> what doesn&#8217;t bend breaks</p> <p>we are made to bleed<br/> and scab and heal and bleed again<br/> and turn every scar into a joke<br/> we are made to fight<br/> and fuck and talk and fight again<br/> and sit around and laugh until we choke<br/> sit around and laugh until we choke</p>&#8221;

—

Buildings and Bridges, Ani DiFranco

(I know I said no more Ani…)

&#8220;<p>Father won&#8217;t you carry me<br/> For the ocean is wide<br/> Father won&#8217;t you carry me<br/> For my boat is small</p> <p>Father on the moonless night<br/> Help me cross the stormy sea<br/> Out here in the darkness<br/> Help me find my way back home</p> <p>Father won&#8217;t you carry me<br/> For the ocean is wide<br/> Father won&#8217;t you carry me<br/> For my boat is small</p> <p>Father in the season of dying<br/> Let me sleep in your arms<br/> And come watch over me<br/> Someone watching over me, over me</p> <p>Father won&#8217;t you carry me</p>&#8221;

— The Prayer Cycle, Movement V: Grace, Jonathan Elias

http://www.petco.com/product/14467/Clevercat-Top-Entry-Litterbox.aspx

Litter Box

&#8220;is developing a plan.&#8221;

—

Core 103: The Process of Change in Science (Dappen)

Required Reading
Bartusiak, Marcia. Through a Universe Darkly. New York: Avon (1995).
Brockman, John. The Third Culture. New York: Simon & Schuster (Touchstone Books) (1996).
Gleick, James. Chaos. New York: Penguin (1988).
Hawking, Stephen. A Brief History of Time. New York: Bantam (1988).
Kane, Gordon. The Particle Garden. Addison-Wesley (Helix Books) (1995).
Lindley, David. Where Does The Weirdness Go? Harper Collins (Basic Books) (1996).

&#8220;There&#8217;s really no hope for me<br/> And that three second rule<br/> Somethin gets dropped<br/> And still I&#8217;m the slowest damn fool<br/> Slow to realize what&#8217;s really going on<br/> Slow to know in a moment<br/> Who or what has gone wrong&#8221;

— Lag Time, Ani DiFranco

Mmmmmm. Jalapeño kolaches.

Pool was open. 1300 yards were swum.

I've been up since 2. I think it's time to try and go to the gym. Maybe the pool will be open?

I CAN HAS EELECKTREESEETEEEEEE!!!!11!!

Not my best night. Blisters on both hands, a head full of singed hair, 2 good burns on my stomach &amp; right forearm. I must be distracted.

I should SO not be allowed to drive a car like this one. heeheeheehee

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/movies/la-et-tall24-2008sep24,0,6136387.story?track=rss

She liked me. I could feel that. The way you feel when the cards are falling right for you, with a nice little pile of blue and yellow chips in the middle of the table. Only what I didn’t know then was that I wasn’t playing her. She was playing me, with a deck of marked cards and the stakes weren’t any blue and yellow chips. They were dynamite.

http://www.muscleandfitnesshers.com/training/100?page=1

M&F Hers: 5 EPOC ideas

http://www.muscleandfitnesshers.com/quads_glutes_plyometrics/training/119

M&F Hers: Lower Body Boot Camp

For now I see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

http://www.2magazine.com/2008/09/sexinpublic/index.php

I may never feel the same way about IKEA again...

I think that your body is something I understand I think that I'm happy I think that I'm blessed -- Ani DiFranco, Swandive

&#8220;<p>cradling the softest, warmest part of you in my hand<br/> feels like a little baby bird fallen from the nest<br/> i think that your body is something i understand<br/> i think that i&#8217;m happy, i think that i&#8217;m blessed</p> <p>i&#8217;ve got a lack of inhibition<br/> i&#8217;ve got a loss of perspective<br/> i&#8217;ve had a little bit to drink<br/> and it&#8217;s making me think<br/> that i can jump ship and swim<br/> that the ocean will hold me<br/> that there&#8217;s got to be more<br/> than this boat i&#8217;m in</p> <p>&#8216;cuz they can call me crazy if i fail<br/> all the chance that i need<br/> is one-in-a-million<br/> and they can call me brilliant<br/> if i succeed<br/> gravity is nothing to me, moving at the speed of sound<br/> i&#8217;m just going to get my feet wet<br/> until i drown</p> <p>and i teeter between tired<br/> and really, really tired<br/> im wiped and im wired but i guess its just as well<br/> because i built my own empire<br/> out of car tires and chicken wire<br/> and i&#8217;m queen of my own compost heap<br/> and i&#8217;m getting used to the smell</p> <p>and i&#8217;ve got a lack of information<br/> but i got a little revelation<br/> and i&#8217;m climbing up on the railing<br/> trying not to look down<br/> i&#8217;m going to do my best swan dive<br/> in the shark-infested waters<br/> i&#8217;m gonna pull out my tampon <br/> and start splashing around</p> <p>&#8216;cuz i don&#8217;t care if they eat me alive<br/> i&#8217;ve got better things to do than survive<br/> i&#8217;ve got a memory of your warm skin in my hand<br/> and i&#8217;ve got a vision of blue sky and dry land</p> <p>i&#8217;m cradling the hardest, heaviest part of me in my hand<br/> the ship is pitching and heaving, my limbs are bobbing and weaving<br/> and i think this is what i understand<br/> i just need a little vaccination for my far-away vacation<br/> i&#8217;m going to go ahead and go boldly because a little bird told me<br/> the jumping is easy, the falling is fun<br/> up until you hit the sidewalk, shivering, stunned</p> <p>and they can call me crazy if i fail<br/> all the chance that i need<br/> is one-in-a-million<br/> and they can call me brilliant<br/> if i succeed<br/> gravity is nothing to me<br/> moving at the speed of sound<br/> i&#8217;m just gonna get my feet wet<br/> until i drown&#8230;</p>&#8221;

— Swandive, Ani DiFranco

&quot;the jumping is easy, the falling is fun, up until you hit the sidewalk, shivering, stunned&quot; -- Ani DiFranco, Swandive

Why does it fell hotter now (3 am) than it did when I first went to bed (11 pm)? Also, why am I up at 3 am?

TWELVE DAYS with no power. 12.

If you love me, buy me books.

• 
  The Lottery (and Other Stories), Shirley Jackson


• 
  To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf


• 
  The House of Mirth, Edith Wharton


• 
  White Teeth, Zadie Smith


• 
  The House of the Spirits, Isabel Allende


• 
  Slouching Towards Bethlehem, Joan Didion


• 
  Excellent Women, Barbara Pym


• 
  The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath


• 
  Wide Sargasso Sea, Jean Rhys


• 
  The Namesake, Jhumpa Lahiri


• 
  Beloved, Toni Morrison


• 
  Madame Bovary, Gustave Flaubert


• 
  Like Life, Lorrie Moore


• 
  Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen


• 
  Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë


• 
  The Delta of Venus, Anais Nin


• 
  A Thousand Acres, Jane Smiley


• 
  A Good Man Is Hard To Find (and Other Stories), Flannery O’Connor


• 
  The Shipping News, E. Annie Proulx


• 
  You Can’t Keep a Good Woman Down, Alice Walker


• 
  Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neale Hurston


• 
  To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee


• 
  Fear of Flying, Erica Jong


• 
  Earthly Paradise, Colette


• 
  Angela’s Ashes, Frank McCourt


• 
  Property, Valerie Martin


• 
  Middlemarch, George Eliot


• 
  Annie John, Jamaica Kincaid


• 
  The Second Sex, Simone de Beauvoir


• 
  Runaway, Alice Munro


• 
  The Heart is A Lonely Hunter, Carson McCullers


• 
  The Woman Warrior, Maxine Hong Kingston


• 
  Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë


• 
  You Must Remember This, Joyce Carol Oates


• 
  Little Women, Louisa May Alcott


• 
  Bad Behavior, Mary Gaitskill


• 
  The Liars’ Club, Mary Karr


• 
  I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, Maya Angelou


• 
  A Tree Grows In Brooklyn, Betty Smith


• 
  And Then There Were None, Agatha Christie


• 
  Bastard out of Carolina, Dorothy Allison


• 
  The Secret History, Donna Tartt


• 
  The Little Disturbances of Man, Grace Paley


• 
  The Portable Dorothy Parker, Dorothy Parker


• 
  The Group, Mary McCarthy


• 
  Persepolis, Marjane Satrapi


• 
  The Golden Notebook, Doris Lessing


• 
  The Diary of Anne Frank, Anne Frank


• 
  Frankenstein, Mary Shelley


• 
  Against Interpretation, Susan Sontag


• 
  In the Time of the Butterflies, Julia Alvarez


• 
  The Good Earth, Pearl S. Buck


• 
  Fun Home, Alison Bechdel


• 
  Three Junes, Julia Glass


• 
  A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, Mary Wollstonecraft


• 
  Sophie’s Choice, William Styron


• 
  Valley of the Dolls, Jacqueline Susann


• 
  Love in a Cold Climate, Nancy Mitford


• 
  Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell


• 
  The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. LeGuin


• 
  The Red Tent, Anita Diamant


• 
  The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera


• 
  The Face of War, Martha Gellhorn


• 
  My Antonia, Willa Cather


• 
  Love In The Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez


• 
  The Harsh Voice, Rebecca West


• 
  Spending, Mary Gordon


• 
  The Lover, Marguerite Duras


• 
  The God of Small Things, Arundhati Roy


• 
  Tell Me a Riddle, Tillie Olsen


• 
  Nightwood, Djuna Barnes


• 
  Three Lives, Gertrude Stein


• 
  Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons


• 
  I Capture the Castle, Dodie Smith


• Possession, A.S. Byatt

The car I'm driving? I bought it.

The car I'm driving? I bought it.

The car I'm driving? I bought it.

Resorting to childhood method of temp regulation in attempt to cool off enough to sleep: apply wet towel to entire body & pray for breeze

Books by candlelight not withstanding, I'd love to get my electricity back sooner rather than later. "Sometime after Monday!"

It's early enough that I could go for a run, but somehow reading a non-fiction mystery set in Venice by candlelight just seems right.

I am the calm after the storm, and the calm before.

is attempting to sort herself out--alone--for the first time in 6-ish years.

second movie in as many days. can i please have my power back now?

Is this what I want? Am I happy? DID I JUST MAKE THE BIGGEST FUCKING MISTAKE OF MY LIFE?

Is this what I want? Am I happy? DID I JUST MAKE THE BIGGEST FUCKING MISTAKE OF MY LIFE?

Sitting on the rooftop patio of some guy I don't know, drinking his beer. Soon I'll go steal his AC.

War zone.

Early morning recon mission to Galveston.

http://charlesandmarie.com/index.php

Charles & Marie

http://lifehacker.com/399407/how-to-sync-any-desktop-calendar-with-google-calendar

NB: How to Sync Any Desktop Calendar with Google Calendar

First day back after two weeks of vacation followed by an additional week of hurrication. Culture shock expected.

Made it to work in the as-yet-unnamed new car. On time. One piece. Success!!

Doghouse Tavern. Drinking the pain away.

http://twitpic.com/c5a0 I'm so jumping up and down right now.

Stopped disinfecting hurricane fridge to go pick up new car.

Ran through airport Got on early flight. Land in Houston at 430.

Didn't implement "Reverse Bel Air" as such, end result the same.

Flying back to TX tomorrow. Worried about the good Pinot...

Ike update: House is fine, cept no power. No water. Office open Tuesday if it's safe to get there. Don't think I'm going back for a few.

Fleeing another night in Queens for the family house in Philly. No flights into Houston today.

Made it to NYC. not optimistic about getting back to houston any time soon.

Waiting to board the plane in Rome to New York. Anxious about tomorrow's flight from New York to Houston. News of Ike hyperbole?

Threw sleeping bags down on a mountaintop pasture. Woke at sunrise. Now on to the Veneto.

Lunch on the shore of Lago di Bolsena. Watching a little girl feed the ducks.

Wandering aimlessly in Siena. Gorgeous! Waiting for our Enoteca of choice to open for dinner. Italians eat much later than Americans!

Climbed the Duomo in Florence today. On to Siena tomorrow. Birre at the Joshua Tree pub right now. Trust my boyf to find the American bar...

Getting ready to leave Rome I'm the morning. On to Florence.

Getting ready to leave Rome I'm the morning. On to Florence.

At JFK. Onwards!! To Rome!!

More errands: Brother's dry cleaning. Lunch. Apple store. Pharmacy. Post Office.

Arrived JFK. Located baggage. On the train with brother.

My new baby will be waiting for me when I get back from Italy.

http://awesome.goodmagazine.com/features/011/Wanderlust/

Wanderlust.

Clarity: languages of love. Time to heal. Extra-communication.

Shrink wrap.

&#8220;Be a woman. It&#8217;s powerful business, when done correctly.&#8221;

—

Resolved to playing both sides.

At the new sports bar with the COP girls.

Packing for Italy. SO SOON!!

My Mini is En Route!

6pm flight to Houston cancelled. Overbooked 5am flight. Barely made it. Now stuck on toll rd behind nasty accident. All lanes closed.

Getting ready to go backwards the wrong way down an entrance ramp.

I love being the only female in the room.

Headed to IAH to go back to Odessa.

Debating the benefits of a reverse Bel-Air.

Yay Houston traffic! Yay!

finally, a shrink in Houston who does NOT offer a side of Jesus with her therapy.

10 days to Italy and counting. Ack!

http://www.amazon.com/Janes-Love-Minx-Cecil-Castellucci/dp/1401213871/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1218820286&sr=1-1

Covetous: Art/Smart Graphic Novels

http://www.olivebarn.com/orb-bird-feeder-yellow.html

For the front porch

After going to an aesthetician as wonderful as Miss Karen for so long, finding a new one to love is so hard!!

The things we do for love...

http://photojojo.com/content/photojojo-original/ultimate-guide-to-road-trip-photography/

Photojojo's guide to road trip photography.

Gym at the main campus.

http://images.marthastewart.com/images/content/web/pdfs/pdf1/0206_msl_garland.pdf

Clip Art Alphabet

http://www.arusticgarden.com/

Source for antique farm ladders

I just singed a bunch of my hair. Amateur!! I blame the pleasant breeze.

I just singed a bunch of my hair. Amateur!! I blame the pleasant breeze.

At Shay at Krafty's... Yum.

Sleep this weekend, I think.

Excellent spaghetti dinner at Matt's house last night, invite via my Couch Surfer, Brad.

Excellent spaghetti dinner at Matt's house last night, invite via my Couch Surfer, Brad.

http://www.thekitchn.com

Makes me salivate

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=97033

Esty Love

http://www.dwr.com/product/tools/house/kitchen/tiffin-lunch-box-set.do

Grown-Up Lunch Box Idea #2

http://www.wallywine.com/p-29679-wine-skin-leak-proof-traveler-5pack.aspx

Wine Skins

http://www.naturemill.com/index.html

Indoor, Odor-Free Composter

My MINI is being built as we speak! Hooray! Zippy Car!

Dinner? Drinks?

Dinner? Drinks?

Yay!! Hurricane!

We just spent an hour looking at fishes. Now we go look at kitties!!

Whole again.

Going on 22 hours. I'm getting too old for this crap.

Happy Hour hopping.

No more get-ups!!

on my way back to H-town...

Weather went all wizard of Oz on us today. Fouled service loop hose: had to lay down the derrick.

Weather went all wizard of Oz on us today. Fouled service loop hose: had to lay down the derrick.

Odessa.

Odessa.

The countdown has begun!!

Starting the week off right. .

Dolly is making me wet.

yellowfin tuna

PDC bits

Cellulitis.

The bites are infected.  I have cellulitis.  Eww.

I love the smell of white gas in the morning.

Debut fire performance with Zion's Flame at the Continental Club.

80s movie trivia at Sherlock's. We lost bc we didn't know the real names of Chunk & Mouth from "the Goonies".

YPE happy hour at the Texas State Bar.

Happy inside?

I'm testing Yoono !

The Indigo Scotch Lounger in all its glory.

My new chairs. Ok, they&#8217;re not <i>new</i>, but the fabric is. $3.50/yard on sale at Glick. Love!

So fresh and so clean. Yay!

Hooray for summer thunderstorms and scientific wild-ass guesses.

Anyone know which type of primate has the bright behind? Help!

is approving invoices, disapprovingly.

http://tinyurl.com/558tx3 Another reason to love http://consumerist.com

http://tinyurl.com/558tx3 Another reason to love http://consumerist.com

http://brocadedesignetc.blogspot.com/2008/07/illuminated-clothing.html

brocade design etc: illuminated clothing
Possibly the new Playa Couture

2-1/2 miles before dawn. Not so bad, right?

It's good to be back. It's good to be gone.

The past few months have held a lot of new/exciting/life-changing things for me:
-fell in love again
-quit my job in CA
-took my first real vacation--EVER
-moved to Houston

That's it in a nutshell pretty much. My old company has been doing some things both locally and on a corporate level that don't sit right with me, and when I got the offer in Houston for a ridiculously large salary and the exact job I want, I realized it was time to go. Ultimately I want to work out of the country, and all paths abroad in the Oil and Gas industry begin in Houston.

The divorce stuff is becoming more final, and it really was just time to leave Southern California. After being there for 8 years I think I'm ready for something new and different.

Another nice thing: for the same rent that got me 800 square feet in Long Beach (with no parking, no yard, and evil construction crew that drop things on my car from the 15th storey) I have 1900 square feet out here, with off-street parking, a yard, and a front porch.

The downside: the man I've fallen in love with is a Long Beach local, and not able to come to Houston with me--yet. We're scheming to get him out here, and in the mean time trying the distance thing.

broken phone

I got the following text message last night. My iPhone promptly self-destructed:

Who will make [my] heart flutter before i fall asleep? Who will warm my soul with a kiss? I will think of you as i drift off my darling, and your loving eyes cradling my being.

Positive Reinforcements

So in an attempt to actually follow up on the things I tell myself I'm going to do, tonight I will:

- sand and spackle my closet
- attempt to steam the wallpaper off in my bathroom*
- unpack at least 3 more boxes

Maybe if I tell it to the internet I'll feel guilty if I don't get these things done. Maybe.

[* I was in the shower with a friend yesterday afternoon (conserving valuable resources, you know), and rather than leaving the window ajar and the door open to prevent the possibility of damp and mold and gross like I usually do, we decided to keep it all shut in and make it as steamy as possible--not that we really needed a lot of help with that, but... Anyway. When I started to pay attention to my environment again (yes, it's that good) I noticed that I was able to see the wallpaper underneath the top layer quite clearly. Being the quick thinker that I am, I wondered if the steam had loosened the top layer any. To my delight and surprise it peeled off with little to no effort. 10 minutes later my bemused shower companion returned to the bathroom to find me naked and dripping, balancing precariously on the top of the sink to reach the last piece in the top corner of the room. You'd think I would have thought of steam as an option to the back-aching scraping and nasty chemicals I had been using before this. You'd think.]

Addiction.

I haven't slept in my own bed alone in almost a week. And that was only one night.

Twitterpated.

Seriously. Butterflies like you wouldn't believe.

It's that amazing feeling when you wake up in the gray morning snuggled next to someone, and just lie there and watch him breathing, his features slowly coming into focus as the light creeping under the shade gets gradually brighter...

Yeah, my morning was like that.

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

I used to have this job with an oil company in Houston. I worked a rotational schedule: 14 days on, 14 days off. This worked out ok for a while, and then it looked like my then-fledgling marriage wasn't going to be able to handle it. So I quit that job--which would have taken me around the world, doing the work that I want--and moved back to LA full-time to take a job that has turned out to be not what I expected.

Only thing is now I'm not married (or soon-to-be-not-married), and I'm stuck in LA with a job at a company I don't like, doing work that doesn't make me happy. It's not that the work isn't interesting or challenging, it's just not what I want to be doing. And I'm coming to realize that LA is not where I want to be living either.

So I've put out a bunch of applications for jobs in other parts of the country, and in other parts of the world. In fact, two of those applications are with the company I used to work for, in the Netherlands and in New Zealand. And both of those applications are currently "under review". Cross your fingers and toes for me!

If I get the job in NL, that will put me right where I said I wanted to be at this point in my career, though certainly not by the route I'd anticipated.

And then there were two...

Since shortly after the beginning of my separation from my husband in November I've been seeing a couple a folks. I figure I'm entitled, right? No sex in my marriage for long enough to have borne a child to term can do something for a girl's self-confidence and sense of self-worth.

So then there were two:
Gentleman #1, friend of one of my best and oldest friends in this city, freelance film writer, producer, and director (read: he makes porn), some of the best sex of my life. Honestly. Mind blowing. I think we started out with a full-on 12 hours of verbal foreplay via text message while I watched the Chargers beat the Colts in the rain in mid-November. Then I spent about 90 minutes naked while he drew me in various poses... I'd never done any figure modeling before and it was fun. Needless to say I was not the only one naked for very much longer... We had a few weeks of really fantastic sex, all the time. It was great. I felt desired, I was losing the weight I'd put on in the months leading up to the separation, he made me feel beautiful. Only thing is, that freelance stuff is feast or famine. And when he has to work on a project all he does is work. Really. For hours and hours and hours at a time, stopping only to eat and sleep, a little. I need a bit more attention than that. Not a lot, but a little. It doesn't help that he lives in LA and I'm in Long Beach...

Gentleman #2, in a band with the boyfriend of my good friend. Musician, sweet as pie, very kind. Spent hours standing on street corners or sitting on his car making out like middle schoolers. Do you remember what it was like before sex? When it was about holding hands in public and kissing outside your house for every single minute you could until it was 10 minutes past curfew and your Dad was about 5 seconds away from storming outside in his boxer shorts to mortify you for the rest of your life? Yeah, it was like that. But the sex... Not so much. I'm not a size queen or a marathon woman, but regardless of what you're working with you have to know how to use it, and how to make sure that before you're done using it I am at least close to an orgasm if I haven't already had about 3 or 4 (thank you #1). #1 isn't huge, but damn does he know what he's doing, and I think the first time we had sex it was for almost three hours. Really. It also doesn't help that #2 lives north of LA and I'm in Long Beach...

Both Gentlemen had their good points, and both had their bad. Put the best parts of both of them together and you've got a pretty decent guy. Sweet and ok with PDA (more so than I am, actually) and able to absolutely rock my world in the bed. That would be about perfect. Except that I realized quite some time ago that no one and nothing is perfect.

#1 went into seclusion to work on his next project and I made the conscious decision to try and slowly phase out #2 after a particularly disappointing sleep-over. I haven't seen either of them in almost a month, #1 I haven't seen since before Christmas. And then there were none.

Enter #3. Friend of the woman who was dating my husband when I met him, who is now married to the man I broke up with shortly before meeting my husband. (Aside: When do I stop calling him my husband? Now? When the paper work goes through? When/if I get married again?). This woman, lets call her K., is great. I'm really glad that we all managed to be friends after the relationship tangles worked themselves out, because she is something special. Anyway, she was in Long Beach visiting a friend of hers who was laid up after a nasty fall at a New Year's Eve party. She and I met up for drinks and snacks and we spent some time getting caught up. She got the full run down on #1 and #2, and then she brought up the man who would eventually become #3.
I had met him before at a party at my old house for K's birthday. He came with a tank full of homemade wine strapped to his back (he home brews and distills)... She was saying how cool he was and that we should totally hang out since now I live in Long Beach, and he lives in Long Beach... And did I want to go over to his place when we were done with drinks? I was a couple mojitos in at that point and suggested he come join us instead.
About 15 minutes later he shows up on his bike and we all spent a fantastic evening together. K was staying at my house for the night and since we weren't really ready to turn in, #3 came back with us too. Long story short (and I'm honestly not sure exactly how this happened), she's asleep on the guest bed in the living room and #3 and I are snuggled in my bed in our pjs.

I think we've spent the night together most nights since then. We waited a (short) while to have sex, and it just keeps getting better and better. That's the best kind. If it starts out mind-blowing (#1), there's an expectation that it will continue to be that great (it rarely is). If it starts out awful (#2), there's not really an incentive to stick around and try to make it get better (it rarely does). But when it starts out good, you don't have any desire to bail on the whole thing but your expectations are reasonable. And then when those expectations are repeatedly exceeded... Mmmm. This is not really the venue for all the details, but suffice it to say I am a much happier sort of a person these days. Amazing what good sex does for one's general outlook on life.
And then there were two.


The only problem with all of this is that there is no problem. #1 and #2 were safe because they both had these big, glaring things about them that rendered them ultimately undesirable. But #3... I do like him. Really I do. But should I? Am I allowed to? Is it even a good idea to contemplate this right now?

...

Home Sweet Home

The homestead is coming together, but slowly. The hardest part is that I've got this vision in my head of the way everything will look when it's finally done, but that vision and the current reality are a bit far apart at the moment.

The living room is half done. And by half done I really mean half done. One side of the room is painted, has furniture arranged, and books unpacked and on shelves. The other side still has yellow walls and is full of unpacked boxes of clothes and office paperwork. If I don't try and look out the window at the beach I can kind of pretend that it's not there... but what's the point of a room with a view if you don't appreciate it?

Low Rider

iPhone tastes like chicken

Remote Blogging

If I'm going to get back into this I'd better do it right...

Sent from my iPhone

I guess I have to start blogging again...

...seeing as I'm getting divorced and all. I think blogger might be my new home. Like so many things, livejournal seems to be a thing of the past.

Things aren't nasty, which is refreshing, but they aren't actually comfortable either. It's probably the strangest break-up I've ever been through, honestly. I think we really threw the marriage counselor for a loop when, during our first session after spending 30 minutes giving her the background we replied to her question of "so what are your goals for couple's therapy?" with:

"You want to get divorced?" (me).
"Yeah, I think I do" (him).

"So I guess you're not coming back for another session, huh?" (her).